Unseen Wounds

There was a night not too long ago when I found myself sitting in the dark, phone in hand, staring at a message I didn’t send. I typed it out three times. Backspaced. Typed it again. I didn’t want to scare anyone—I just wanted someone to know that I wasn’t okay.

But the truth?

I didn’t even know how to explain what I was feeling. I just knew I felt… empty.

It wasn’t a loud cry for help.

It was a quiet ache that had been building for months.

💔 

This is what suicidal thoughts looked like for me:

• Smiling on the outside while screaming on the inside.
• Serving everyone else’s needs while silently drowning in mine.
• Going to bed praying I wouldn’t wake up—not because I wanted to die, but because I didn’t want to feel like this anymore.

I thought I was just “being dramatic.”

That maybe I was just tired, or hormonal, or sensitive.

But the truth was deeper: I was in pain. Soul-deep pain. And I didn’t know how to talk about it without feeling like a burden.

🧠 

Suicidal thoughts aren’t always loud. Sometimes they’re just whispers:

• “What’s the point?”
• “I’m so tired.”
• “They’d be better off without me.”
• “I don’t feel anything anymore.”

And if you’ve ever thought those things, let me tell you something that no one said to me when I needed it most:

You are not broken. You are overwhelmed. And overwhelm can be helped.

🙏🏽 

What saved me?

Honestly… it wasn’t a single moment.

It was small, quiet decisions. Choosing to text a friend even when I felt ashamed. Letting someone pray for me even though I didn’t feel worthy. Whispering “God, help me,” even when I didn’t know if He was listening.

And somehow, help did come.

Not all at once—but gently. Slowly. Through people. Through words. Through grace I didn’t think I deserved.

🕊️ 

If you’re feeling this right now—please hear me:

You are not too far gone.

You are not invisible.

You are not the only one who’s ever felt this way.

You are someone’s answered prayer.

You are still becoming.

Please don’t make a permanent decision over a temporary pain.

📞 

Take the next small step. Even if your hands are shaking.

• Reach out to someone safe.
• Call or text 988 (if you’re in the U.S.)
• Go sit with someone who doesn’t need you to be perfect.
• Let someone walk you back into the light.

✨ 

Final Words for the Soul That’s Tired

You don’t have to be strong every day.

You don’t have to carry it alone.

And you don’t need to wait until you “have it all together” to be loved.

You are not here by accident.

Your life matters.

You still have pages to write.

You still have people to love and be loved by.

You still have sunrises to witness, laughter to feel, and healing to embrace.

And I pray—right here, right now—that this blog post becomes the soft voice that reminds you:

Stay. Breathe. Let someone in. The world is not better without you. It is better with you healing.